Wednesday, August 13, 2014

Wonder Woman Wednesday-End victim blaming

Before you learn about the girl, I want you to see her story in her words:


"At about 2 a.m. Friday morning, Jon Koppenhaver arrived announced to my home in Las Vegas, NV. After he broke up with me in May, he moved out of my house and back to San Diego. When he arrived, he found myself and one other fully clothed and unarmed in the house. Without a single word spoken, he began beating my friend; once he was finished, he sent my friend away and turned his attention to me. He made me undress and shower in front of him then dragged me out and beat my face. I have no recollection of how many times i was hit. I just know the injuries that resulted from my beating. My injuries include 18 broken bones around my eyes, my nose is broken in 2 places. I am missing teeth and several more are broken. I am unable to chew, or see out of my left eye. My speech is slurred from my swelling and lack of teeth. I have a fractured rib and severely ruptured liver from a kick to my side. My leg is so badly injured, I have not been able to walk on my own. I also attained several lesions from a knife he got from my kitchen. He pushed the knife into me in some areas including my hand, ear and head. He also sawed much of my hair off with his dull knife.
Her wounds were severe
After some time, the knife broke off of the handle and continued to threaten me with the blade. I believed I was going to die. He has beaten me many times before, but never this badly. He took my phone and cancelled all of my plans for the following week to make sure no one would worry about my whereabouts. He told me he was going to rape me, but was disappointed in himself when he couldn't get hard. After another hit or two, he left me on the floor bleeding and shaking, holding my side from the pain of my rib. He left the room and went to the kitchen where I could hear him ruffling through my drawers. Assuming he was finding a sharper, more stable knife to end my life, I ran out the back door, shutting it behind me so the dogs did not run inside to tip him off. I hopped the fence to the gold course behind my house and ran into a neighboring house. naked and afraid he would catch me, I kept running through the neighborhood running through the doors. Finally, one answered and I was brought to the hospital and treated for my injuries.
Jon Koppenhaver
aka War Machine
I would like to thank everyone for their support through this rough time. I am healing fast and well, and I appreciate a lot of the prayers and visits I have received over the past few days. After many months of fear and pressure to keep this man happy, although I fear for my life, I feel that I can no longer put myself in this situation. The cheating by him nearly everyday, and almost weekly abuse, is now more than I can stand. There is a $10k reward for the capture of Jonathan Koppenhaver at this time. Please report any information to your local police.
Thank you.

- Christy Mack


Christy Mack
Christy Mack spent a very long time in the hospital recovering from her wounds which included, but were not limited to a broken face, missing teeth, fractured bones, multiple stab wounds, and those don’t even come close to the wounds she felt in her heart and soul.

Jon Koppenhaver, who already has a prison record, is still at large.  He is an MMA fighter who goes by the name War Machine.  He resided in San Diego, California and there is a $10,000 reward for any tips that lead to his arrest. 

Now that you know the story in her own words, remember that no matter who you are, you reside in a human body that can be hurt, tortured, raped, and even killed.  Christy Mack is a retired porn star.  She began her career as a model, and then found herself in the pornography industry.

Because of her choice of profession, victim-blaming has lit the web like wildfire after she told her story.  Well, she was a porn star, she deserved it.  She was with another man, she deserve it.  Her lifestyle makes her responsible for it.  She chose to have him in her life, she should have known better.    One Huffington Post commenter said he hopes, “she recovers and takes time to reevaluate her career.”  Another said, “She makes a living being subordinate to men sexually and professionally, why wouldn’t she do the same in her personal life?”

One person even went as far to say, “She’s driving an industry that promotes little girls being kidnapped and sold into sex slavery, so she should be in prison.”

“B*#& was probably cheating on him, she deserves to get beat.”

“U can’t change a whore into a housewife.”

War Machine even tried to defend his actions on twitter on August 10th by tweeting, “Real men rape their wives and girlfriends, not strangers, don’t get your panties in a bunch.” Which he later removed. 

No matter what your feelings are on this, set them aside.  Christy Mack did not get beaten nearly to death in a porn movie.  Koppenhaver didn’t beat the crud out of a fictional character; he beat the heck out of a girl named Christie who just happens to be a porn star.

I know this Wonder Woman Wednesday is going to create some controversy.  How can you give an award to a woman who makes a living in an industry that goes against your mission?  Porn drives sex trafficking, that is a fact, and I know it very well, but I can’t help but remind you that it does not matter what profession you are in, no one deserves to be beaten.

Think about it this way.  In the profession she’s in, knowing the backlash she would get because of that profession; imagine the bravery it took for her to come forward.  Imagine the courage it took for her to go public knowing that there would be a huge amount of victim blaming.  She did it anyway.  She knew it would be hard, she knew it would be brutal, and she knew that she would be blamed, but she did it anyway.
Today as you read this, I want you to realize something.  Victims remain victims because of victim-blaming behavior in a rape culture.  We can fight against pornography, and I do, and we can fight against sex trafficking, which I also do, but while we’re doing that, we also need to commit to ending victim-blaming.  We can’t fight against one without ending the other as well.

Victim-blaming is a very real thing.  It has to be talked about and brought to the forefront.  We can't sweep stories like this under the rug just because the victim is also famous for having sex for money.  No matter what a girl does, is doing, or has done, she deserves the right to become a survivor, and if we hold her under because of her choices, she will never rise above and be able to use her story for good.  A victim is a victim no matter what.
For her bravery and courage to come forward and tell her story, for being strong enough to handle the backlash of comments and commentary, for looking past the judgment on her life, the threats, the harsh words, and the victim blaming and coming forward, Christy Mack receives this week’s Wonder Woman Wednesday. 

Do you or someone you know have a story to tell?  Email sunshine@yourdamseldiva.com and you may be featured as a Wonder Woman Wednesday award winner.

If you or someone you know has been hurt and needs help, I can help find resources in your area.  You are not alone.



2 comments:

  1. To Sunshine and Christy I say Kudos! Thank you for taking a stand and fighting back. To Sunshine, thank you for taking the side of the victim. As a retired law enforcement officer it was always hard when dealing with a victim of rape or assault to have the female victim shy away from me. My first thought was she must me faking something the way she is holding on to my male partner. One day I spoke with a rape advocate and she advised that the reason they lean on men is because WE WOMEN are more judgmental and they already are full of shame. I pushed myself to never let that be me. Now I am proud to continue that mission as a Damsel Pro. Best wishes to both of you!

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